So you’ve decided to take an astral lover if you ended up here. Your lover could be anyone or anything from an elf to a ghost to a Deity. But before you begin please read the ‘Why do I want this?’ section. I have been an Orthodox Christian my whole life. I love the Lord and serve the church he has revealed Himself to me in. I’m 30 now, not married, gainfully employed with a career and a home and settled in a place where I believe God has called me to serve. I am aware that to continue my transformation into the likeness of Christ I must become part of a community where I am practicing sacrificial love and denying myself. The path I see is in marriage and children.
In almost 15 years of coaching women, I have seen that the experience of falling in love with a married man cuts across almost all cultures, age groups, ethnicity, religions, and education levels. Despite the knowledge that this scenario is unethical, immoral, and guaranteed to bring pain to everyone involved, many otherwise smart, single women get their hearts tangled up this way.
I will have to agree with you Op. I guess it won’t be so hard on people who haven’t spent some good time with each other. The girl I recently asked out, we were flat mates for 3 months. When she moved back to her country, I was really sad. We kept in touch for quite a few months once or twice every week. We always have been close friends. Recently after a few days of asking her on a date (she never rejected it and told me that she had expected that this was coming), we had a misunderstanding and had a bad fight. The sad part is that both of us hold on to our anger for quite some time and we are not talking to each other for some time (though I apologized). I just keep wondering how things which were so good became so ugly. I think this is one thing which makes LDR difficult.
Now that world is gradually transitioning towards equality, men need to understand that women and less privileged men are not their resources. A man cannot decide how a woman should lead her life. Meanwhile women need to realize that men do not owe them romance, commitment or happiness. As long as he is not harming others, it is a man’s choice whether to be hunter or gatherer. Women cannot decide that for him. In any modern, individualistic and peaceful society, each individual is responsible for his or her happiness and cannot hold opposite sex (or any other person) responsible for an unfulfilling life. If both sexes realize this fact, confusion and frustration will disappear.
I am a 35 year-old virgin man who has been rejected by women all throughout my schooling: From elementary school to post-grad. In elementary and high school, people made made fun of me if they found out I liked a girl. I have always been rejected by women, be it in social events, work or in public. I have tried many dating strategies and nothing works: Playing it cool- rejected; being interested- rejected; combination of the two- rejected; being myself- rejected.
This devotion helped me to realize that I really do need to nurture my friendships with other women. I feel as though I am always spending time on my family and I am not giving any of my girl friends ANY time or energy. It was good to see that in writing that I do need girl friends. I was just talking to one of my best friends today and it is awesome that your devotions are always right on point. Very refreshing for the soul to know God is working it all out for His glory. Thank you. And thank you, Lord!